Sunday, February 05, 2006
As I write this it’s now officially Sunday morning as it’s now 12:39 am. I had set my intentions upon staying at my best friend’s home, however, his partner’s father (Mr. George) was unhappy with my presence (something none of us can figure out) and he told me that I didn’t belong here. Mr. George was nervous and upset while I was there, so I quickly gathered what few things were in their home and packed up. I’m now writing this as I sit in the Explorer where Roadie and I will spend the night. I’ve grown accustomed to sleeping in the Explorer now and find it very comfortable. Regarding Mr. George’s comments, I sense he isn’t just talking about my presence in their home; it’s something more, that I don’t belong here in Austin. Ever since I arrived I’ve felt odd and that’s why I’m departing some time around Noon I hope.
I did enjoy spending time with Debbie and Alisha because they both listened to my stories about my adventures. We all talked for a few hours and they shared their troubles with hot water at their apartment. It was good to see Debbie again as she always brings a smile to my face because she is such a delightful person. I’m sure she will be curious in the morning as to why I’m not there, so I will set my intentions to call her tomorrow to let her know why.
I’m sad at the moment. It’s as if I am suddenly without a home, a true wanderer. I suppose that is what this adventure is all about, finding my real home, finding my real self, finding truth and purpose in this life. However, knowing this doesn’t help stop the tears that are flowing at the moment as I realize another chapter in my life is closing and a new one is about to begin. I like the people I met here in Austin and hope that in time I can see them again. The people I was able to spend time with today are Stephanie (she is the friend and client who paid for my first Holographic Repatterning session with Lauren.), Jim (Groovy Lube’s Manager and friend to Bobby and Stacy Delmonico the owners, who are also friends and clients.), Phillip (a delightful man I met some time ago at Genuine Joe’s who is dating James.) and Stephan (the young man who is subletting my apartment.) It was good to see the people at Genuine Joe’s as I have missed hanging out there.
There are so many things running through my mind at the moment, so please bare with me as I may flit about. I’m curious where I shall call home and when it will be brought about. I am anxious as to the timing of such because if I’m not to be here in Austin, then where am I supposed to be? I’m parked in the apartment parking lot and Roadie has already fallen asleep. Something I will do shortly. I feel as if there is a great wind beginning to blow and that it will be making a lot of changes soon, not only in my life, but in the lives of so many others. I’ve always ran away from the truth about myself and who I was, however, I’m learning to embrace this aspect now. Mr. Bear at The Cabin in the Woods was a great help in teaching me to accept my strength and power. Mr. Bear is me, I am him. Mr. Bear is a representation of my true self. The Mr. Bear experience taught me the importance of accepting all aspects of self. And, for me, it was the power and strength that Mr. Bear represented that I have run away from so many things. I was running away from myself. Which as all of us know, isn’t something we can do, for we will always follow ourselves. I’m ready to depart here now, but I have to wait until I can pack up some things from the apartment. For now, I’m tired and need rest.
Namaste,
