Tuesday, January 10, 2006.
I have arrived a bit ago at my sister’s rural home in North Louisiana. Today Roadie and I had a great time traveling. The first day of has already been a great time for self-reflection. We took the back roads again, which I believe will be our choice for most of our journey. The pace is too quick on the major highways and on the back roads we can take our time enjoying the beauty along the way. My favorite movie is The Color Purple. There was a statement made in that movie about God’s gift of the color purple in flowers, how they reached to the sky, how they almost demanded appreciation. I’ve discovered the wonderful gifts of abundant energy when we take time to appreciate God’s gift of beauty around us. It’s a way of acknowledging Him and His wondrous creation. It seems that the plants are always connected to God’s energy and through their appreciation we can learn to stay connected with God’s energy, thus filling daily energy requirements and having ample extra energy to share with others. In the book “The Celestine Prophecy” by James Redfield it talks about how we can plug into God’s energy through this process of connecting with nature. I know that when I’m feeling a bit low on energy, unconnected, and need the strength to keep going that I can stop for a bit and see the beauty around me. Like today as we traveled there was a long stretch of trees along the road, all barren for winter’s sleep, but in their midst I noticed a beautiful gift of color. There were these smaller trees with no leaves that were showing the color of red in their berries. It was a delightful site and as I acknowledge the beauty and appreciated it, thanked them for their bright color in the midst of slumber; I was filled with joy, love, and new energy. That has been the way now for some time – when I need energy I stop to appreciate the beauty of nature.
Roadie was a bit nervous and anxious upon our arrival and expressed his need for some attention and love. So before I could begin to write I had to live in the moment and share my love with him. He’s now resting securely beside me after I reassured him that everything was well and that he was safe. He was a delightful travel companion and as we approached Louisiana I could sense he felt my nervousness about coming home. He came up from the back of the Explorer where he had been most of the trip and requested to sit in my lap. However, instead of lying down in my lap, he curled up in my right arm that had been placed as a stepping tool. He remained curled up in my arm nuzzled beside me, cradled in my arm. I could sense his love as he gazed, as he often does, into my eyes. I’m learning to love unconditionally through Rodie’s gift of unconditional love. I’m thankful that he has chosen to travel with me.
I’m discovering that being Open to living in the moment brings great things. It’s now 3:50 am as I am getting back to writing. My brother-in-law, Vic, came home from work and we’ve been sharing with each other. Vic and I share the same birth date, although he’s 5 years younger than I, thus, we have a full understanding of what it is like to be born under the sign of Gemini – the twins. Vic and I have always had a great joy of conversation. I’ve greatly missed being close to him over the last 5 years and tonight he acknowledge the same from his point of view and that I was forgiven for walking away from the life I was living some time ago. I sense our communications are now on a higher plane because tonight we talked of God, of His Son Jesus Christ, the scriptures, our faith, along with the many aspects of the paradox of God and how the various religions today all have their root in the basic knowledge of God but have split because the people couldn’t grasp that paradox. It seems that each religion has taken on as aspect of God’s paradoxical being in order to have a single aspect as their focus. When we can accept that God is a paradox then we can more readily accept the various points of view surrounding how we as humans view him. We can more easily realize why the various Greek and Roman gods, along with various other forms of gods were created – to acknowledge an individual aspect of God because mankind couldn’t understand the whole being (essence) of God. We can more easily accept each other, even if we have different views.
Vic, amazingly, was the first person I could share part of what was learned today during my meditational travels – what my Life’s Path is. Here is the affirmation that I was given today regarding my Life’s Path:
I am Sebastian Lynn St.Troy. I am the servant of the Lord Jesus Christ, the Son of the Most High God – The Great I Am. I am the embodiment of the moon goddess Helene, goddess of fertility and love. I am guided and protected by the Arch Angel Gabriel. I am worthy of a great abundance of Love, Respect, Honor and Wealth. I am Open, Vulnerable and Empty.
Now I’m sure some of you are saying, “what!” So even though it’s late I’ll share a bit. Today I met two men at various times. The first, Tim from Wisconsin, at a rest stop where we talked for a bit then he acknowledged his faith in Jesus Christ. He asked if I believed in Jesus Christ and I responded, “we are on the same path.” As we parted I sensed he lost something and so had I. I realized that I didn’t acknowledge his faith nor encouraged him with my response. Thus I left him without the affirmation and encouragement to help him continue upon his path of faith. (Tim, I pray that some how you will have a chance to read this – I apologize for not providing you with what you needed today when we met – encouragement and acknowledgement of your faith in Jesus Christ.) Within an hour I met another man, my new eye doctor. I noticed items in his office that dealt with scriptures. I asked him a question that drew an initially awkward response, “I hope that your spirituality is greater than your religion?” He then acknowledged his faith in Jesus Christ, the Lord and Savior, the Son of God. After my first lesson, I wasn’t going to miss this opportunity so I acknowledged his faith in Jesus Christ and thanked him for sharing this with me. I shared that I also believed in Jesus Christ. This opened up more conversation; which allowed an even exchange of something we both needed in order to continue on our own paths. Thus today I learned that I have to acknowledge my faith in Jesus Christ, the Son of the Most High God – The Great I Am. However, I also have to acknowledge the embodiment of an aspect of God’s essence – Love and Fertility as expressed through a goddess, the moon goddess Helene. (Please note the use of capital G and lower case g, as this is important. There is only one true God, however mankind has used the idea of gods and goddesses to express various aspects of God and it’s these lower case gods and goddesses that each of us is embodied with as part of our being – a part of God’s essence in each of us, a gift given to us by God to fulfill our Life’s Path.) Thus, part of my essence then is dealing with fertility (new birth) and love.
I have always known and believed that each of us were protected and guided by angels sent by God. Today, I asked to know the name of my angels. The only one named was Gabriel – God’s chosen messenger. I asked to hear and see clearly my angels and as I drove I began to see the Explorer wrapped with a great essence. As things became clearer, I noticed that we weren’t just wrapped by it, but rather that the Explorer, Roadie and I were being carried on the wings of an angel. I was filled with awe and wonder. I cried. The thought that we were being carried by one of God’s Arch Angels was over whelming, that God sent this special angel as my personal guide and protector. I am honored.
The other parts are things I have struggled against for most of my now 43 years; that of being worthy to receive love, respect, honor and wealth. I now feel worthy and ready to accept these aspects fully into my life. I used to live my life in fear of being able to be my true self, however, I’m learning in order to live a life without fear I have to be open to new ideas, concepts, beliefs and for what ever may be presented along my life’s path. I have to be vulnerable – able to be hurt, with the ability for great emotion – for through this vulnerability I show my heart so others can see who I really am, what I stand for, what I believe in, and can be true to myself. I have to empty myself of previously held ideas, concepts, old stories applied to events and happenings, and religious and other such teachings. By emptying myself of these things I am learning to be able to accept others, to hear their beliefs, and to see their hearts. (No particular event or thing has a meaning until we apply a story to that event or thing, nothing is good or negative, and only the stories are that we’ve applied to them. By emptying ourselves of these stories, we can begin to heal and grow – we can begin to change our lives for the possibilities of positive aspects.)
I finished this writing this morning at 8:17 am. I stopped after writing about being worthy of a great abundance of love, respect, honor and wealth. I realize now that it was because I needed to head into restful slumber with this thought on my mind so that I can continue to empty myself of old ideas of not being worthy. I am worthy. Everyone is worthy, if only we empty ourselves, be vulnerable and open.
Today I’ll be starting to work my sister and her family on creating positive energy and protection for their home. That’s why I’m here. My sister and her family – Vic and Kailyn – need protection and positive energy in order to grow. We’ll be focusing energy (Ch’i) in the areas of Love and Romance, Wealth, Health and Family, and Knowledge and Self Development. Key points will be made regarding Wealth and Health and Family. The protection comes two fold – to protect their home and to protect the land they live on. We’ll be using the Evil Eye at their front door and at the entrance to the property to help ward off negative influences in their lives. There is a major negative influence here on the family farm and I’ve been shown that within a year that negative influence will leave because of this protection. I look forward to seeing my mother removed from this negative influence so that she can again remain true to herself and become the loving, nurturing, inspiring woman she is.
For now, I’ll leave you with this question – What is your life path?
