For some years now I have always lived in someone else’s home, either renting or living with friends. Lately, after living with my sister and the experiences of the traveling, I’ve started to become more interested in obtaining a place for me, something I own. Nothing to grand, mind you, just something small, yet big enough for Roadie and I, hopefully with a yard for Roadie or at least a park or green space so we can go walking.
Yesterday, I began a several projects and as I was working on each one, all I could think about was that I should be doing this to create something for me, yet all of my life, I have created for everyone else, nothing for me. I’m talking about homes here, not art or other things, as I have created plenty of that for myself. I’ve never been one that desired a home to call my own, so this is something new for me. Perhaps it is time for me to create roots and settle down somewhere, but where? I know that the Great God/Goddess will provide the way, the place, and the property when it is time for such things. I just have to continue to believe and trust in the good and correct.
Since I’ve begun my work with the I Ching, it seems that I’ve begun work on changing my way of thinking. Every lesson so far has dealt with the aspect of how I perceive others; that I should only see what is good in them, however, bad they may seem. I’ve been shown that humility, reticence and love should guide our paths, along with faith and belief that the Great Sage will guide my path. It seems the natural paths are always curvaceous, lined with trees and things to prevent us from seeing too far ahead, thus we travel our Life’s Path through faith not knowing what is to come, only believing in what is good and correct for ourselves, and developing our character so we can remain firm in our beliefs and firm in only seeing what is good. It’s our attitude and thoughts that guide our lives, encourage others, and allows all of us to be free.
In an earlier writing I spoke about mental prisons, it seems that we can create them not only for ourselves, but for others by the way we think (or believe) about them. I suppose that is why yesterday’s I Ching reading was one that took me some time to work through. As I have been “looking behind,” “looking ahead,” and “looking aside” concerning myself and my family members when I should be just enjoying the moment, seeing the good, and believing. I had believed that I had begun to deal with my issues regarding my real mother, but apparently I still have issues to work through. It is a lesson that will not be easy for me, but I am working towards only seeing the good and correct in my family, especially my mother, who of late I haven’t been very nice to.
Even amongst my family, while living here, I have withdrawn some. I’m learning reticence. I’m learning to hold my tongue and only speak when the time is right and then only to speak what is good and correct. Developing one’s character hasn’t been a strong suite of mine as I have let many things hamper my progress because for a long time all I’ve wanted to do is run away. The time for running is past and now is the time for learning to stand firm and be strong enough to endure the various waves that may rush over me.
Thought for now: When we look at family, friends, and other people what do we see? Do we see the past, the future, or do we see only what is good and correct within them? Do we choose to see them in a positive way? I’ll be the first to admit that this isn’t always easy, for I’ve been learning the hard way. But I have to admit the truth of the situation, that it is for our own peace of mind that we learn to see the good and correct, to live our lives without fear or doubt, and to believe in the power of the Creative, the Divine God/Goddess to guide our lives.
